Monday, December 28, 2009

Predictions for 2010 – Part II

Let’s see what the coming year have installed for us shall we.

As anyone with half a brain already have figured out Internet is doomed, at least for most ordinary users. We already know there will be more restrictions, more additional legislation and that surveillance will creep into everything.
A pedophile used Facebook? Oh my lord! Time to wind up the thought police another notch, right Timmy?

Terrorists sent one email, grandma wished to read about Hitler, some kids wanted to play the latest game, ordinary citizen downloading Gangbang Girl 69, some bloggers are writing the truth about global warming, an information site have been dishing the flu shoot, and let’s not forget all the racists right-wing gun-toting maniacs that hate Oduma and wants to marry their own cousin. Any excuse will do and no matter what the thing we can all be absolutely sure about for the coming years is that more restrictions, more surveillance, more control functions, more departments and so on will emerge comes to internet.

For some reason there’s still people out there asking ‘why’. Idiots. How can mainstream media, big business, government and all the elitists run their scams if the real information and truth is available for every smuck with a computer? Well, they still can with massive information campaigns and miss-information spread around, but still it’s too much of a liability. People may be educated, find out that they have been lied to, or actually start to think for themselves. Now that’s scary, people actually reading, researching and drawing own conclusions? Uhuh… that we cannot have.

Of course this is not all bad. The Pirate Party may grow in strength, and entire generations of youngsters will start to detest government. Hopefully some hacker will destroy the financial system, erase all the ones and zeroes keeping the stock markets alive and delete all history from all treasury computers. Now that would be funny. It will not save internet from being overrun by fascist creeps, but at least we would get a good laugh out of it.

Well, nothing that big will happen, but one or two will hack into some defense system during next year, quite possible on orders from government, knock out some traffic-lights or piss off some bureaucrat which of course leads to even more fascist laws that the government need to invent to stop such acts from happening again.

Predictions for 2010 – Part I

Let’s see what the coming year have installed for us shall we.

One tingling sensation emanating from my well-shaved balls that has grown stronger over the latest year or so and is now reaching Spiderman-grip levels is the imminent threat of an terrorist attack.

There are many signs pointing in this direction. We have economic and socioeconomically reasons to believe such acts are being planned right now. Different political structures and such events as the Swish vote to ban minarets or the recent burning of a Mosque in West Midlands, UK, seem to imply a growing tension. We’ve also seen demonstrations, a mounting support for anti-immigrant policies and many other funnies. However, the thing that will, without a doubt, force a reaction is the warring going on in the Middle East.

How many hundreds of thousands of refugees and immigrants from Afghanistan, Iraq, or Pakistan do we not have in our western countries? Do you think that all these people are alone and have no living relative still in their home country suffering and dying right now? How reasonable is it to say that bombing Muslim villages and murdering thousands of women and children will not awoke anti-western feelings among Muslims? Even those out there stating and believing in the wars cannot with a straight face argue that retaliations aren’t expected.

Millions are refugees in Pakistan roaming the countryside starving and getting bombed by US military, there’s a civil war going on in Yemen, we have the sable-rattling between Iran and the US and so many other hilarious pranks being played out right now that I’m absolutely sure that soon, very soon, we will experience an terror act of unprecedented size and horror. As I’ve said before the most likely target is pretty large mid-western cities like Oklahoma were the security is lower. However, I would say it is far more likely that a country like Denmark, Switzerland or France get hit rather than the US. Why? More a feeling than anything else really. And if we listen to the doomsters and tin-foil hats London is the next target.

But whatever the place we can be sure of four things. Firstly it will have a unifying negative effect among the elitists. Their plans to impose super-restrictions on airports and total lock-down of internet can be implemented without any larger opposition. They get a scape-goat to blame when the economy crashes, which they can sell as an unfortunate consequence of such terrorism (they cannot themselves be blamed for financial calamities, oh no…), and people wanting to bring home the troops will get fewer or at least get less heard. Secondly it will be a huge boost in approval ratings for most, if not all, sitting governments. We tend to hold on to those in charge when things like wars and large terrorist attacks happen. Even the worst government in modern history led by Gorgon Brownie in the UK may actually survive another term if they get an external enemy to fight. People get afraid, are already afraid today. Not very strangely then, with this in mind, that so many suspect Georgi W Chimp for the 9/11 attacks. I’m not one of those, but such desperate measures have been taken by governments before and why not again.

Lastly I will laugh and say ‘I told you so’.

The magical tale of depression

Oh, hello, there, gentle readers. You caught me catching up on old favorites. It's wonderful to get lost in a story, isn't it? Adventure and heroics and discovery: don't they just take you away? Come with me now, if you will, gentle readers. Join me on a new voyage of the mind. A little tale I like to call: how we destroyed our way of life.

Our story begins, not very surprising, with a bank.

This bank was central for the righteous planners. It had appointed virtuous men guarding its secrets and no ordinary citizen were allowed any insights into its affairs. Whenever a problem within the kingdom come to pass, the virtuous well educated manly men within the bank acknowledged this problem and acted accordingly - they embarked on mystic tales of adventures spreading the good notes of wisdom. These notes, magical in their existence, came in abundant supply and could easily be spread around the kingdom with a press of a button. The notes held no inherent value, but oh so fun our heroes at the bank had when they handed them out. With colors, numbers and the occasional hero of the past printed on them - what could anyone do other than love such notes? And whatever the problem may have been, new notes were printed to extinguish any predicament.

Our brave and noble champions of the bank also had another way of quenching any cultural quandary; they could fictionally increase or decrease how the ordinary inhabitants of the kingdom acted comes to purchases. With yet another press of an enchanted button numbers rose or fell according to whatever the powers that be wanted. With these means at their disposal the market was supposed to adjust itself accordingly.

But as with any tale in stepped the villain – the horrid common man. Oh, what a vile and loathsome creature of pure evil he was. Wanting what’s best of himself and his family he mostly ignored what the heroes of bank wanted. How can anyone not detest such a scoundrel? And as if the private choices of the common man weren’t enough, he sometimes even saved money when he should spend it or vice versa.

So our heroes called for the power that be whom, sitting at their enchanted castle, couldn’t stand idly by while this horrible monster worked outside the goodness of what was right and true. And so they issued several decrees stating that the common man was the enemy of the kingdom and so should be taxed, controlled and be tied down with magical chains. And if this despicable one wouldn’t comply the powers built dungeons to hold him for crimes against those deemed better.

Our virtuous heroes could now press buttons all the time, throwing notes around like there’s no tomorrow. Heighten or lower any numbers they wanted in order to keep the divine plan running.

But the common man had yet another sinister idea; he could hide his earnings in another kingdom or, worse, could work less. Both options would lower the amount of wealth pouring into the pockets of those above hence the powers handed out another decree of righteousness said to be the most helpful act of benevolence in history. This because the decree made it illegal to store too much wealth, since it, of course, belonged to those ruling the kingdom. The decree also clearly stated it was a crime to have any personal interests and to express an own opinion through the grapevine should hence forward be known as acts of terror.

And again our virtuous heroes could press buttons and have fun, again throw notes around, and again heighten or lower any numbers they wanted in order to keep the divine plan running. They could also, together with the high and mighty, employ more of their kind to further bring in stability and control.

The common man, now deemed evil, prosecuted, beaten down and kept within righteous rules first reacted as he should, complying with the order of things, but as time went by he once more resorted to his sinister ways. Apparently sinful to his bones and without shame he again started to ignore the rules, started a new way of earning his own money and seemed unwilling to use the magical notes or follow the magical numbers of the honorable bank.

Again the powers together with the bank issued new laws, printed more notes and handed out more numbers for everyone to follow. Creating more wonderful rollercoaster’s of finance. And again they could employ more of their kind to further bring in stability and control.

And so the story goes on and on until either the common man brings forth pitchforks and torches to storm the castle or the kingdom plunges into war and financial disaster.

Oh, I cannot wait to see how our story ends. Can you?