Sunday, August 5, 2012

Message from those deemed better

No, this is not a mirror...

There are so many green shoots in the global economy today that it is hard to understand all the gloom and doom out there. The worst of the Eurozone crisis is now behind us, and Europeans can now look forward to a brighter future, with increased job opportunities and exciting new business prospects. The last bank stress test report was simply superb, which bodes well for the stability of the European banking system. Right now, peripheral debt is a clear buy, offering double digit yields to those who trust in the strength of the global recovery and the wisdom and courage of our international leaders.

Both the Japanese and American economy have shown great progress lately with x-mas shopping already picking up speed and great institutions like NASA showing us that anything is possible. We have also been told that if great leaders of man are faced with more troubles they can always, and gloriously, print more money and borrow more from our not yet born children and grandchildren and all will be well again.

On the war front things are also heading in the right direction. Afghanistan is now clear from warmongering terrorists and all their puppy fields are now in the hands of the trustworthy CIA. Drones patrol the world sky - ever vigilant and always ready at a moment’s notice strike at the heart of any home, bazar or school harboring horrible foes of humanity. Iraq is today a peaceful place and every Iraqi citizen is filled with the hopes of democracy and freedom. Of course Syria and its ally Iran keep pestering the world and since Iran hasn´t attacked anyone in 200 years we know they are due to strike at any moment. They are simply too peaceful and their unwillingness to submit to the almighty dollar is reason enough for our great leaders to mount a counteroffensive. But fear not, as previously The Powers That Be will not sit idly by and let Iranians go about their lives without intrusion.

It's also very soothing to any economist that the fractional reserve central banks, in cooperation with each other and with the mega banks of the world, and especially the mega banks in the U.K. and the U.S., have projected, whereby the inner circle gets to mark their assets to whatever number is necessary to deem them solvent, and whereby they can borrow as much fiat at near zero interest cost with which to buy sovereign bonds and bank an automatic spread, day after day, week after week, month after month, and so on and so forth.

This automatically means they all show, and will continue to show, solvency, but if not, as mentioned above, there is always the printing and electronic 'creation' of mind-boggling sums of fiat. Hence we are also suffocating the very last vestiges of capitalism so to save the people from the horrible Mr. Market.

 As surly as Captain Haddock’s outbursts are coded homo-speak you can all rest assure that we are heading in the right direction.

Only a few larcenous criminal organizations such as the NRA, the anti-war movement and organized libertarians remain to complain about our glorious future. Also we have a few bloggers and alternative news sites that continue to elude captivity within mainstream ideas. However we can ease your mind and tell you that even if magnificent regulations and wonderful new laws labeling such horrific opponents to progress as terrorists has been temporarily halted, new ones will follow and soon all the news and reporting will be from reliable and honorable corporately owned and government controlled media – as it should be.

We are heading for an outstanding future of unprecedented riches; all you haft to do is to accept more austerity for a tiny little wee while longer.

Now, all of you! - stand up and stretch out your right arm with the hand open palm down and repeat after me: 
We, the sheople, pledge our allegiance to the system and to the state. 

We promise to follow any guideline given from above and we promise to buy more TV´s to help the economy and our great leaders save the planet. 

We, the sheople, will promise to allow any intrusion into our lives in order to stop terrorism and pedophilia. 

We, the sheople, will also wholeheartedly believe in manmade global warming and embrace collectivism as the only way forward. 

All hail politicians! All hail banksters! All hail journalism!