Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Global warming causes socks to disappear.
I just figured it out. You know how it always seems that no matter how careful you are when doing laundry, it always seem to be one sock that missing its partner? I have actually (this is true) counted and been absolutely certain that the number of socks in the washer is an even number, everyone having their bellowed with them in the laundry basket. I do the laundry and tada! There is one lonely sock just grinning at me with the intent to invoke insanity.
But now I know how and why this happens. It’s because of global warming. It just hit me that the hole in the ozone layer (that was supposed to have killed us all by now if you read newspapers in the 80’s) in combination with warmer (or cooler, depending in which day you watch the news) climate on this planet have reversed the polarization of every washer. Early man did not have this problem, socks stayed were they were. If you washed them, they still hang together in pair, not alone. Early man did not have washers or electricity, which is pretty much the only difference in washing. So the conclusion that this change somehow makes socks go: poff!, is not very farfetched. And as we all know, electricity and electrical appliances are the main reason why we have tornados, rainfall and got the resent fires in Australia. So global warming is causing socks to disappear. This revelation have made me completely aware of my contribution to the world’s problems and in the same spirit as when the European Union banned light bulbs and the Swedish government outlawed mercury, I now will wash my socks in the river. Back to basics people. Fire by rubbing sticks together and moving around on horseback is the way to go.
Upplagd av apocalypse nowish kl. 1:08 AM