Global warming cause’s rainfall

During a huge gathering today with hundreds of scientists, politicians and journalists some chocking news was revealed. Global warming might be responsible for some rainfall. One prominent scientist was quoted saying: “Rain is a horrible thing; it causes floods and is also the main ingredient in several toxins like alcohol and coffee”. A politician, who wants to remain anonyms, explained to some reporters that he never knew how many people actually drowns each year and that something has to be done.

The government have scheduled a press conference tomorrow morning were they are expected to announce a hard-line policy against this menace with higher taxes and even banning of several products containing water. The science community however doesn’t seem to think those kinds of actions is the only way to go. Instead they are calling for further study and that the government needs to add billions for research.
A former Nobel Prize winner leaving the scene pronounced: “I hope we don’t find out that more weather phenomenon can be affected by global warming, if it is it would be disaster for life as we know it”.

Outside protesters screaming for blood happen to spot a scientist that coming out of the assembly hall not wearing an anti-water pin and immediately attacked him. The police managed to break him free accept from a woman wearing clothes made up of dried up leafs that was shouting “murderer”. Apparently her cat had died last week while her owner tried to teach her how to swim.