The fascism that is Cheez Doodles

I had a revelation today while nibbling on some Cheez doodles. When growing up those things came in all shape and sizes, and I don’t mean in different bags, no, in the same bag they were big, small, and crinkly and could even taste a bit different. I don’t know if this was the case throughout the world, but it certainly was in Sweden.

However, today this has changed.

For some reason, probably by decree from the European Union, they are all the same today. Almost to the millimeter they have been conformed into a slightly smaller unified size with the same color, and same taste. They are almost scary similar.
Do you see what they have done? They have transformed something so so flawed (but tasty) that comes in all shapes and sizes into something highly conventional – if that’s not pure fascism I don’t know what is.

And this isn’t the first time this has happened and it will certainly not be the last. Step by step they are transforming our surroundings into a unity of color, size and taste. I wonder when they start questioning how appropriate it is for some to have bigger dicks than the rest…