The bizarro world of humans

Starting my day by reading Leg Iron, as I always do, I felt the need to check out news across the globe on my own. Although almost all news bulletins in our modern time has an inherent charm, I actually find that what most people wouldn’t consider ‘fun’ as the funniest stories of all.

Let me give you some of todays amusing examples.

Remember Haiti? They had a little rumble the other year, got an obscene amount of billions thrown at them, and now they have a Cholera outbreak. Why is this funny? Because the country has received so much money in aid, even before the Earth Quake, that the 9 million inhabitants should be relaxing on beautiful beaches. Instead they are starving, they still have about 2 million people homeless (or close to it) and now they are facing an illness easily avoided.

What they need are self-reliant citizens with an understanding on how to build houses. What they need is an armed populace able to defend themselves and their property against thieving lefties. What they need is freedom and a minimalistic government that stay out of peoples affairs. What they need is capitalism. Instead they got ex-presidents W-chimp and the McDonald’s munching Cunt’on, do help them. What they got was billions upon billions in aid sent alongside thousands of rescue workers and so many containers filled with water, food and blankets that it could have fed the entire city of Miami for a year. It didn’t work, it never works. So they continue to starve, they continue to be bullied around by a corrupt system, and they continue to attract funny diseases easily avoided.

Another side-splitting story comes from Mexico where gunmen stormed a party in the border city of Ciudad Juarez killing at least 13 people and wounding 14. Although not yet directly linked to the Mexican governments war against its own people, it’s not very farfetched to think that certain inhabitants going on these sorts of sprees can be linked to the pointless war on drugs. Instead of letting people make informed decisions on a open market making drugs cheap, clean and free from mafia, the Mexican government prefers tens of thousands dead. What every government in the history of this planet has failed to do, the Mexican thinks they can do with enough corrupt police officers and a couple of helicopters from the U.S. For every detached head found and for every easily avoided massacre I cannot help myself laughing, and laughing, and laughing…

In Sweden the police continue to hunt for a serial shooter. This fiendish “man-like” fanatic racist homophobic Muslim-hating Nazi right-wing maniac shooter between 20-40 years (with a margin of error of some years) is apparently getting around on a bike on his well-planned spree. It seems that he’s a lousy shot since all his victims are still alive, but he’s still putting the scare into people so they hardly want to go outside. At the same time we’re told about several rapes all over the country. Women are, as usual, defenseless victims without any sort of self-reliance and need to count on the mighty police for protection.

As the solution to both of these problems is obvious – allow self-defense! – I cannot help finding the whole thing really funny. I am not saying all rapes or all cycling fiendish “man-like” fanatic racist homophobic Muslim-hating Nazi right-wing maniac shooter between 20-40 years (with a margin of error of some years) would go away if people were allowed to defend themselves, but if I were a rapists or a fiendish “man-like” fanatic racist homophobic Muslim-hating Nazi right-wing maniac shooter between 20-40 years (with a margin of error of some years) I would certainly think twice before attacking someone if I knew people are armed.

And finally, saving the best for last, U.S. Secretary of State, Mrs. Cunt’on, have announced a $2bn aid package to be send to Pakistan. This on top of the more than $1bn of aid a year since 2005; last fiscal year, U.S. gave nearly $2bn. This sounds kind of “good” doesn’t it? Maybe you’re thinking they want to help Pakistan with the hundreds of thousands of fleeing refugees getting hunted down by U.S. drones, or maybe you’re wondering how much of this help will go to the starving and hurting from the flooding catastrophe, or maybe it’s a way to repay the damages done by military strikes into Pakistani territory, or maybe it’s just a gesture of good will.

Nope.

All that money and what the media is calling “aid” is going to the Pakistani Military.

Isn’t that great!?

Here we have a completely broke America running enormous deficits and running head first into a giant depression, but they still manage to conjure up billions to be send to the army of what needs to be considered a dictatorship while the people of said country is suffering immensely. Now that’s funny!

People don’t want to be saved; they want misery, disasters and wars. Look around you, the evidence is compelling. How many live on the edge of volcanoes and act surprised when lava flows into their living room? How often do we hear about a fisherman going out to sea when a hurricane is about to hit? People live in wooden houses without storm cellars in the path of tornado clouds; others go swimming in shark infested waters and cannot believe they’ve lost an arm. Every year people whooshes of the road because they get astonished that it snows above the pool circle.

And, maybe funniest of all, where do people turn when they need to be rescued? To the very entity that is largely responsible for most of the hurting – to government. In order to be saved from wars and starvation they turn to the creature that is the only thing capable of starting wars and the entity that is almost single-handedly responsible for every famine catastrophe throughout history.

If you don’t find this amusing then there is something wrong with you.