Swines work in mysterious ways

The cute – and kind of harmless – Hog Flu, has been used by virtually everyone by now. Pharmaceutical companies and journalists use it for selling their products, politicians use it to scare people and divert attention from real dangers like the economy or diseases that actually are dangerous like TBC, AIDS, malaria or even regular flu (the "normal" flu has killed 40 000 this year compared to 850 for the Swine variation). Certain companies selling masks, antiseptics and similar products have benefited. With the exception for, maybe, travel agencies and certain touristy places, there seem to be no end to how this piggy flu can be used.

For instance it can be used as a deterrent like the Mexican football player that spitted and blow some nasal secretions at one opponent while telling him he had swine flu. The player in question got suspended for a while. Even if this is not really like throwing blood in someone’s face and saying you have AIDS, I do guess this opponent had a bit of trouble sleeping that night.

In Sweden another fun little flu-enterprise have popped up. Apparently some people pretending to informing about the flu are going around knocking on doors and then, once inside, rob the place. It is entrepreneurial spirits like this that might lift my home nation from the depression in the future, if piggy flu haven’t turned everyone into zombies and killed all kittens before.

And, of course, there are lots of spam and junk-mail containing viruses (the computer kind) being spread from early on and lots of chimpanzee’s in the general public like to open those email that has no known sender and mysteriously pops up in the mail-box. Such an email might contain the chemical formula for ridding the world of the evil swiney flu!!

But these incidents and phenomenon cannot even be compared with governments making the best of this situation. Our leaders to the rescue! We need hot-lines, stockpiling of certain items, emergency teams most be assembled, and, of course, the funniest of all; millions or even tens of millions of people “need to” be injected with a vaccine containing dangerous components that apparently not even been fully tested yet. Yes! Our governments have - yet again - put on spandex and a cape to save us all from the mother of all diseases. Oh, I do not want to be in those pink shoes when our bellowed rulers get their hands on ‘em.

You should all do what I do, step aside, take a moment, inhale some calm and then watch the headless chickens of the human race running around doing this or that. It is hilarious stuff, especially when you are accompanied by a bottle of vodka and some popcorn. People are idiots, and that is fun fun fun…